True Friendship….
True Friend…
Have you ever heard of the phrase, “I thought you were my true friend?”
It has been on several occasions I have thought of the term “true friend”. What it is? How it is defined? What is the true value of this expression? I can only imagine that each person will probably have its own understanding and thus differ in its meaning as well.
The urban dictionary defines, “A true friend is someone who has touched your heart and will stay there. Someone you care for, who cares for you. Someone you can do the stupidest things around and always be forgiven. Someone you’ll instantly remember in ten years because they are in your heart and not just your mind. They have the ability to change you, even if they don’t. They will be etched in your memories forever.”
The article in Psychology Today titled “true meaning of friendship” narrates, “The Japanese have a term, kenzoku, which translated literally means “family.” The connotation suggests a bond between people who’ve made a similar commitment and who possibly therefore share a similar destiny. It implies the presence of the deepest connection of friendship, of lives lived as comrades from the distant past. Many of us have people in our lives with whom we feel the bond described by the word kenzoku. They may be family members, a mother, a brother, a daughter, a cousin. Or a friend from grammar school with whom we haven’t talked in decades. Time and distance do nothing to diminish the bond we have with these kinds of friends.”
Friendship as I recently observed, has a twisted reality. I am not here to define what a true friend can be defined as. I am not here to express how this should look like. However, I am here to reflect on what it seems like.
Like everything we do in our lives, we form relationships. Well on this principle our friendship, true friendship is also a relationship. We share same amount of responsibilities as we progress in our lives within these bonds of friendship.
So if we ever get questioned about being a true friend, or not understanding the needs of a relationship, or being asked for explaining, and or other similar q&a, pause before your response in defense or pause before your response to have a one up. There is no necessity to respond unless we carry an apology.
Even if we choose to answer, assess first, as to what has been our part in that relationship, were we present in the times it called for our support, were we able to assist without being asked for assistance, were we compassionate about any activity of our friendship, were we silent when we were suppose to, did we share grief, happiness and so forth. Now it’s time to ask ourselves the same questions where was the person friend who is questioning us to validate the friendship relationship, and assess the answer.
We may not always be the winner but this will give us a good definite assessment to a response. One may recognize the facets of the friendship relationship and make essential adjustments. In fact this is not about winning or loosing or being stubborn or being foolish, perhaps this is about discovery and exploration, to examine and find out what the relationship is build from instead what it is built on.
A beautiful song “My Same” by Adele (Adele is an incredible singer.)
Thank You for listening…
Peace and Peace!
